Giving Love Explained.


Let me just say a few things before I really go into this post.

  1. Kyle Hanagami is a BEAST. Period.
  2. This song gives me the “feels” beyond explanation.
  3. Ed Sheeran is pretty much thee Ginger Jesus and he is here to save the music industry. I’m not even kidding, he’s one of the best artists our generation has to offer. I was blessed enough to go to a live show and I was pretty much re-born.
  4. I’ve over-played this video so many times, I’m probably why it has thousands of views (or everyone else who swims in the Ocean of Awesome has found it and hit play) on YouTube.
  5. What came out of this video: the donation to cancer research, participation with the audience, the emotion exerted into the choreography, the visuals, and overall message is incredible. Please redirect back to my first point.

Love is such a hard thing to explain but such a great feeling to experience. In my previous post, Relationships Explained, I tried  to find the right words and bring this kind of topic to justice. I want to go a bit deeper and touch on how love isn’t just found in a romantic relationship. Love is feeling valued, like you actually matter, because someone cares about your well-being and wants to ensure that you never forget you are worth it. In Harriet Jacobs’ Incidents in the Life of a Slave Girl, I stated how love was absent in relationships. But it is more important to dive into how important that feeling is. In the beginning of the video we see that Kyle receives a letter that is full of negativity, which he then rips, and goes to break into his choreography. I feel like the novel’s character Linda, is just like Kyle in the start of the clip. She has been hurt and ridiculed for so long. Derogatory words on paper were lived in reality and constantly attached to her name. The song “Give Me Love” is pretty self-explanatory… it’s asking you to give him/her love. I think the voice really calls out the cry that Linda makes. I feel the desperation in her story like I feel the desperation in the song. Linda wants to be valued and truly feel love, because the pain has to give hope to a more positive emotion. There’s gotta be some pay off. Love is a sort of liberation, freedom in the constraints of pain. Not only does this apply to Linda, but also to her mistress, Mrs. Flint. As jealous as she is, she too, wants love. This paranoia she experiences is because of her desire of love. Mrs. Flint is aware of her husband’s unfaithfulness, but continues to work towards acquiring his affection, even if her ways of reaching them are wrong. Still, I understand her longing to be seen as her husband’s love, not just a wife. The partnership is not enough, it is missing that special connection to really be one.

Believe it or not, this video/song/post, applies to Dr.Flint as well. I’ve expressed how much I dislike his character (because I hate cheaters, creeps, and abusive people. Who doesn’t?) But it was as if this song was created by Dr. Flint.

Give me love like never before,
‘Cause lately I’ve been craving more,
And it’s been a while but I still feel the same,
Maybe I should let you go,

You know I’ll fight my corner,
And that tonight I’ll call ya,
After my blood is drowning in alcohol,
No, I just wanna hold ya.

I pictured him in a more vulnerable state as I listened to this song, particularly as the lyrics above played. He’s a character that seems to be stuck in this life of misery. Because of slavery, he has developed this mindset of having to rule, being the emotionless, harsh authority figure who is immovable.  He needs something different, something that has depth like he has never felt before. Dr. Flint needs a damn hug. This song expresses the same desperation of Linda’s for Dr. Flint. Perhaps if he had received love that was so pure, he wouldn’t be this horrible man. Had his upbringing been full of affection and learning to reciprocate this attitude, and not about how slavery can benefit him, Dr. Flint can be more likable. Perhaps he would respect Linda and his wife. I’d even dare to say he would be capable to love another. This song explains, as well as serves as Dr. Flint’s apology to why he is the way he is. Intense right?

This pain reflects on so many of us and the solution to it all is love.

If you read my About Me, you’d see I attend St. John’s University… and we are required to take a few Theology courses. So, my professor from my Christian Marriage course would give me a whole repeat lecture on how love is definitely not an emotion but “a voluntary decision to act upon the good of another.” And I get it! But I would like to think that because we act for the good of another, we value them. Love is why we act.

Kyle’s video throws a punch right to my gut, in both a good and bad way, where bad… is actually a little good too. Follow me? At my lowest points, I just want someone to pick me up and tell me I’ll be okay. I want someone to tell me they are there for me. I need assurance that I am loved. In my highest point, I feel closely related to the end of the video. I feel so liberated. I want to throw confetti in the air or jump up and down, because I have people who love me and we are in celebration (of whatever it is) together. During Ed’s live performance of this song, the whole Hammerstein Ballroom felt like it was floating on air. People were singing at the top of their lungs, some had their hands in the air like they were praying to God above, others I even saw crying. It’s because it connected. We all know what pain feels like. But when we are given love, things change. That’s because love is freeing. It feels great to be free and it feels amazing to be loved.

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